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How to Meditate: Meditation 101 for Beginners
10 Science-Backed Benefits of Meditation
What is Meditation?
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How to Meditate: Meditation 101 for Beginners
10 Science-Backed Benefits of Meditation
What is Meditation?
Benefits of Mindfulness: Mindful Living Can Change Your Life
Mindfulness 101: A Beginner's Guide
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Hey, welcome back to your Daily Mindfulness. Today, we're going to talk about how to embrace failure. So when I was in college, I got interested in Brazilian jujitsu. If you're not familiar with jujitsu, it's a ground martial art that focuses primarily on submission. So no striking.
I found it to be a beautiful martial art and essentially got addicted to it. The first summer of training, I trained twice a day, six days a week. And that first month was pretty demoralizing because I got my butt kicked. Now, obviously when you're starting out in anything, you're going to be one of the least skilled people there or alongside a number of other people at the same beginner level. But the time slots I trained in always had people with higher belt ranks.
So every match I went into, I got submitted. I would learn something new at the beginning of class, then we would grapple and I would tap out every single time. It would be an arm bar, a rear naked, choke, a Kimora. And of course in the beginning, this was fine because I was new and expected this to happen. But after a month of this of exerting, so much effort, so much energy to still be getting tapped out each time was tough and it often brought up a lot of emotion for me.
Maybe you've noticed this with things in your own life. You have something you care about, you're pouring your heart and time into it, really trying to get it right, but feeling like nothing's happening. You're not making any movement and it can take the wind out of your sails, at least it did for me. But I continued. And one day something interesting happened.
I was grappling with someone ranked higher than me and for the full five minute session, he couldn't tap me out. So I went back to the sideline, tried to play it off cool like that's what normally happens. But inside I was like, Whoa, what just happened? That was interesting. Uh, so I took a sip of water, went back into the next match and again, went the full five minutes and didn't get tapped out. This time, I'm like looking around seeing if anyone's noticing.
This hadn't happened before. And so I'm starting to think, wow, like something is shifting here. Went back to the sideline, took another sip of water, went back out with more confidence. This time got tapped out. So it wasn't happening every time, but something was shifting.
And shortly after this, I developed a reputation in the jujitsu school as someone that was very difficult to get a submission on. I wasn't doing much offense. I was basically just spending five minutes in a ball, protecting myself. But, uh, that first month of making all of these different mistakes is what led to an understanding of the things not to do. And for me, it created a bulletproof defense.
Eventually I was able to move on the offense and start getting my own submissions as well. So what does this have to do with you? Well, I'm sure you can resonate with the idea of, of something that you're going into in your life that you're struggling with, having a hard time getting it right. And it could be stuff with a relationship or wondering why you keep falling into the same patterns with people, communication struggles, or maybe a new role in your work not getting the best feedback or as a parent feeling like you're not always saying the right thing and getting angry when you wish you could be calm. I think there's something to, keeping in mind the story of me going through my jujitsu journey, uh, and when you're in those moments of what you perceive as failures, perhaps you can see that as a learning opportunity, as your learning experience, as the thing that's developing the defense against those things happening again. See if you could try out that perspective and notice how it shifts your relationship to those moments.
Thank you for your practice. I'll talk to you soon and take care.
How to Embrace Failure
Personalized support for learning how to integrate mindfulness into your life. Delivered fresh everyday by our world renowned experts. Choose meditation duration:
Duration
Your default time is based on your progress and is changed automatically as you practice.
Hey, welcome back to your Daily Mindfulness. Today, we're going to talk about how to embrace failure. So when I was in college, I got interested in Brazilian jujitsu. If you're not familiar with jujitsu, it's a ground martial art that focuses primarily on submission. So no striking.
I found it to be a beautiful martial art and essentially got addicted to it. The first summer of training, I trained twice a day, six days a week. And that first month was pretty demoralizing because I got my butt kicked. Now, obviously when you're starting out in anything, you're going to be one of the least skilled people there or alongside a number of other people at the same beginner level. But the time slots I trained in always had people with higher belt ranks.
So every match I went into, I got submitted. I would learn something new at the beginning of class, then we would grapple and I would tap out every single time. It would be an arm bar, a rear naked, choke, a Kimora. And of course in the beginning, this was fine because I was new and expected this to happen. But after a month of this of exerting, so much effort, so much energy to still be getting tapped out each time was tough and it often brought up a lot of emotion for me.
Maybe you've noticed this with things in your own life. You have something you care about, you're pouring your heart and time into it, really trying to get it right, but feeling like nothing's happening. You're not making any movement and it can take the wind out of your sails, at least it did for me. But I continued. And one day something interesting happened.
I was grappling with someone ranked higher than me and for the full five minute session, he couldn't tap me out. So I went back to the sideline, tried to play it off cool like that's what normally happens. But inside I was like, Whoa, what just happened? That was interesting. Uh, so I took a sip of water, went back into the next match and again, went the full five minutes and didn't get tapped out. This time, I'm like looking around seeing if anyone's noticing.
This hadn't happened before. And so I'm starting to think, wow, like something is shifting here. Went back to the sideline, took another sip of water, went back out with more confidence. This time got tapped out. So it wasn't happening every time, but something was shifting.
And shortly after this, I developed a reputation in the jujitsu school as someone that was very difficult to get a submission on. I wasn't doing much offense. I was basically just spending five minutes in a ball, protecting myself. But, uh, that first month of making all of these different mistakes is what led to an understanding of the things not to do. And for me, it created a bulletproof defense.
Eventually I was able to move on the offense and start getting my own submissions as well. So what does this have to do with you? Well, I'm sure you can resonate with the idea of, of something that you're going into in your life that you're struggling with, having a hard time getting it right. And it could be stuff with a relationship or wondering why you keep falling into the same patterns with people, communication struggles, or maybe a new role in your work not getting the best feedback or as a parent feeling like you're not always saying the right thing and getting angry when you wish you could be calm. I think there's something to, keeping in mind the story of me going through my jujitsu journey, uh, and when you're in those moments of what you perceive as failures, perhaps you can see that as a learning opportunity, as your learning experience, as the thing that's developing the defense against those things happening again. See if you could try out that perspective and notice how it shifts your relationship to those moments.
Thank you for your practice. I'll talk to you soon and take care.
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This is the app I turn to when I want to feel calm and loved.
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Melli has a beautiful way of guiding and reminding us of the stillness within.
- Adrienne James
I have been on a journey of healing and learning self-love. Amidst the work, I have been using the mindfulness app for the gentle reminders, guides to the moment (especially the difficult ones).
Kelly Boys offers a fresh and illuminating take on how to step out of lifelong patterns that keep snagging us.
- Tara Brach, PhD
Truly life changing. This isn't solely meditation and mindfulness...this is about striving to be the best the versions of ourselves.
- Marisa, Plus+ Member
Relaxing and assuring beyond description... thank you, Cory.
- Babs312
This is the app I turn to when I want to feel calm and loved.
- Abby
Melli has a beautiful way of guiding and reminding us of the stillness within.
- Adrienne James
I have been on a journey of healing and learning self-love. Amidst the work, I have been using the mindfulness app for the gentle reminders, guides to the moment (especially the difficult ones).
Kelly Boys offers a fresh and illuminating take on how to step out of lifelong patterns that keep snagging us.
- Tara Brach, PhD
Truly life changing. This isn't solely meditation and mindfulness...this is about striving to be the best the versions of ourselves.
- Marisa, Plus+ Member
Relaxing and assuring beyond description... thank you, Cory.
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Shamash's guidance is a gift of wisdom to help us in our busy and stressful lives.
- Paul Gilbert, PhD, FBPsS, OBE, Centre for Compassion Research and Training, University of Derby, United Kingdom
Excellent! Cory gently guides you into internal peace.
- Steve Ericson
A necessary tool for those who feel lost.
- Piper
Just want to say a big thankyou to all involved as this has had a positive impact in my daily life 🙏 Valuable teachings that have allowed me to have a better relationship not only with those around me, but with myself. Heal ourselves and we heal the world 💫✨🌍
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I start every day with Cory or Melli for my daily practice. Including this app into my practice helps me continue to build more mental focus and understanding of my thought processes. What a welcome and powerful gift.
- Oku
Shamash's guidance is a gift of wisdom to help us in our busy and stressful lives.
- Paul Gilbert, PhD, FBPsS, OBE, Centre for Compassion Research and Training, University of Derby, United Kingdom
Excellent! Cory gently guides you into internal peace.
- Steve Ericson
A necessary tool for those who feel lost.
- Piper
Just want to say a big thankyou to all involved as this has had a positive impact in my daily life 🙏 Valuable teachings that have allowed me to have a better relationship not only with those around me, but with myself. Heal ourselves and we heal the world 💫✨🌍
- Marty
I start every day with Cory or Melli for my daily practice. Including this app into my practice helps me continue to build more mental focus and understanding of my thought processes. What a welcome and powerful gift.
- Oku
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