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How to Meditate: Meditation 101 for Beginners
10 Science-Backed Benefits of Meditation
What is Meditation?
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How to Meditate: Meditation 101 for Beginners
10 Science-Backed Benefits of Meditation
What is Meditation?
Benefits of Mindfulness: Mindful Living Can Change Your Life
Mindfulness 101: A Beginner's Guide
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Hi, and welcome to your Daily Mindfulness. Today, I'm going to talk about how we can deal with the moments when we get triggered. So, first of all, what do I mean when I say the word triggered? So that word can be used in lots of different ways. So just want to clarify here that when I'm using the word triggered here today, what I'm referring to is when we have a really strong emotional response to something. Usually it's an unpleasant emotional response of some kind to something that happened in the environment.
So one of the things that can happen when we get triggered is that we immediately have this urge to do something in the external environment. So we might want to, for example, yell at someone or just say something to put them in their place. Give them a certain look, write a hasty email, make a hasty phone call. We might have that urge to beep your horn really loudly at a driver in traffic, or to act coldly towards someone or maybe even withdraw. So because of the way that the human mind has evolved, anytime we feel threatened or afraid we do have a very strong tendency to want to immediately to lurch into some kind of attack or a defense type of response or behavior very, very quickly.
For our ancestors, the cavemen and cave women, this was a really wonderful response to protect ourselves very quickly in any moment of immediate danger. Now, for us these days, if we're just acting out of our intense emotions in a reactive way, that's not going to be very helpful for us if we're doing it all the time. But what can we do instead? So one more helpful approach is to think about when we get emotionally triggered to think about leaning in instead of acting out. So leaning in instead of acting out so. We can lean in, in three basic steps.
Any moment when we get triggered, the first thing we can do is take a pause and if possible, take a breath. One deep breath in and out. It starts to down regulate your nervous system a little bit. And in that moment, just taking some time to just recognize what the emotion is that we're feeling. So it can be helpful to actually mentally name the emotion to yourself.
Like right now I'm feeling angry, right now I'm feeling scared or sad or whatever the emotion is. But now we're not trying to change the emotion, just noticing it and accepting that it's here, acknowledging that it's here. So after we do that, the second thing we can do is take a moment to investigate what is happening for us and trying to do that with an attitude of kindness and curiosity. So we might ask ourselves things like, gee, what's going on inside me right now? What brought up these feelings? Or, you know, what kinds of thoughts have I been having about what's happening that are leading me to feel like this? So we're just taking a moment to inquire. Maybe you might ask yourself also what needs of mine are not being met in this moment.
So after we inquire about what's happening in our experience, the final step is to bring a sense of nurturing and kindness to yourself and to the emotion. You might even say something to yourself mentally like, oh, gee, this is really hard. May I be kind to myself in this moment. The reason that kindness is a really powerful step is because kindness soothes the nervous system, settles the mind and gives us back the mental space and composure to take wise and skillful action if we need to. So step one, recognize and name the emotion.
Two, investigate with curiosity. Three, bring kindness to yourself and the feeling. So the next time you find yourself feeling triggered, try leaning in instead of acting out. As always, thank you for your practice and your presence here. Let's settle in now for today's meditation.
Leaning in Instead of Acting Out
Personalized support for learning how to integrate mindfulness into your life. Delivered fresh everyday by our world renowned experts. Choose meditation duration:
Duration
Your default time is based on your progress and is changed automatically as you practice.
Hi, and welcome to your Daily Mindfulness. Today, I'm going to talk about how we can deal with the moments when we get triggered. So, first of all, what do I mean when I say the word triggered? So that word can be used in lots of different ways. So just want to clarify here that when I'm using the word triggered here today, what I'm referring to is when we have a really strong emotional response to something. Usually it's an unpleasant emotional response of some kind to something that happened in the environment.
So one of the things that can happen when we get triggered is that we immediately have this urge to do something in the external environment. So we might want to, for example, yell at someone or just say something to put them in their place. Give them a certain look, write a hasty email, make a hasty phone call. We might have that urge to beep your horn really loudly at a driver in traffic, or to act coldly towards someone or maybe even withdraw. So because of the way that the human mind has evolved, anytime we feel threatened or afraid we do have a very strong tendency to want to immediately to lurch into some kind of attack or a defense type of response or behavior very, very quickly.
For our ancestors, the cavemen and cave women, this was a really wonderful response to protect ourselves very quickly in any moment of immediate danger. Now, for us these days, if we're just acting out of our intense emotions in a reactive way, that's not going to be very helpful for us if we're doing it all the time. But what can we do instead? So one more helpful approach is to think about when we get emotionally triggered to think about leaning in instead of acting out. So leaning in instead of acting out so. We can lean in, in three basic steps.
Any moment when we get triggered, the first thing we can do is take a pause and if possible, take a breath. One deep breath in and out. It starts to down regulate your nervous system a little bit. And in that moment, just taking some time to just recognize what the emotion is that we're feeling. So it can be helpful to actually mentally name the emotion to yourself.
Like right now I'm feeling angry, right now I'm feeling scared or sad or whatever the emotion is. But now we're not trying to change the emotion, just noticing it and accepting that it's here, acknowledging that it's here. So after we do that, the second thing we can do is take a moment to investigate what is happening for us and trying to do that with an attitude of kindness and curiosity. So we might ask ourselves things like, gee, what's going on inside me right now? What brought up these feelings? Or, you know, what kinds of thoughts have I been having about what's happening that are leading me to feel like this? So we're just taking a moment to inquire. Maybe you might ask yourself also what needs of mine are not being met in this moment.
So after we inquire about what's happening in our experience, the final step is to bring a sense of nurturing and kindness to yourself and to the emotion. You might even say something to yourself mentally like, oh, gee, this is really hard. May I be kind to myself in this moment. The reason that kindness is a really powerful step is because kindness soothes the nervous system, settles the mind and gives us back the mental space and composure to take wise and skillful action if we need to. So step one, recognize and name the emotion.
Two, investigate with curiosity. Three, bring kindness to yourself and the feeling. So the next time you find yourself feeling triggered, try leaning in instead of acting out. As always, thank you for your practice and your presence here. Let's settle in now for today's meditation.
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This is the app I turn to when I want to feel calm and loved.
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Melli has a beautiful way of guiding and reminding us of the stillness within.
- Adrienne James
I have been on a journey of healing and learning self-love. Amidst the work, I have been using the mindfulness app for the gentle reminders, guides to the moment (especially the difficult ones).
Kelly Boys offers a fresh and illuminating take on how to step out of lifelong patterns that keep snagging us.
- Tara Brach, PhD
Truly life changing. This isn't solely meditation and mindfulness...this is about striving to be the best the versions of ourselves.
- Marisa, Plus+ Member
Relaxing and assuring beyond description... thank you, Cory.
- Babs312
This is the app I turn to when I want to feel calm and loved.
- Abby
Melli has a beautiful way of guiding and reminding us of the stillness within.
- Adrienne James
I have been on a journey of healing and learning self-love. Amidst the work, I have been using the mindfulness app for the gentle reminders, guides to the moment (especially the difficult ones).
Kelly Boys offers a fresh and illuminating take on how to step out of lifelong patterns that keep snagging us.
- Tara Brach, PhD
Truly life changing. This isn't solely meditation and mindfulness...this is about striving to be the best the versions of ourselves.
- Marisa, Plus+ Member
Relaxing and assuring beyond description... thank you, Cory.
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Shamash's guidance is a gift of wisdom to help us in our busy and stressful lives.
- Paul Gilbert, PhD, FBPsS, OBE, Centre for Compassion Research and Training, University of Derby, United Kingdom
Excellent! Cory gently guides you into internal peace.
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A necessary tool for those who feel lost.
- Piper
Just want to say a big thankyou to all involved as this has had a positive impact in my daily life 🙏 Valuable teachings that have allowed me to have a better relationship not only with those around me, but with myself. Heal ourselves and we heal the world 💫✨🌍
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I start every day with Cory or Melli for my daily practice. Including this app into my practice helps me continue to build more mental focus and understanding of my thought processes. What a welcome and powerful gift.
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Shamash's guidance is a gift of wisdom to help us in our busy and stressful lives.
- Paul Gilbert, PhD, FBPsS, OBE, Centre for Compassion Research and Training, University of Derby, United Kingdom
Excellent! Cory gently guides you into internal peace.
- Steve Ericson
A necessary tool for those who feel lost.
- Piper
Just want to say a big thankyou to all involved as this has had a positive impact in my daily life 🙏 Valuable teachings that have allowed me to have a better relationship not only with those around me, but with myself. Heal ourselves and we heal the world 💫✨🌍
- Marty
I start every day with Cory or Melli for my daily practice. Including this app into my practice helps me continue to build more mental focus and understanding of my thought processes. What a welcome and powerful gift.
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