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How to Meditate: Meditation 101 for Beginners
10 Science-Backed Benefits of Meditation
What is Meditation?
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How to Meditate: Meditation 101 for Beginners
10 Science-Backed Benefits of Meditation
What is Meditation?
Benefits of Mindfulness: Mindful Living Can Change Your Life
Mindfulness 101: A Beginner's Guide
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Hi, and welcome to your Daily Mindfulness. Today I'm going to talk about dropping the shoulds. So to start off with, I'd like to invite you to listen to the following sentences and just notice if they sound familiar to you and how they make you feel when you hear them. I should be a better partner. I should be getting more sleep.
I shouldn't be eating so much. I should be a better parent. I should have known better. I shouldn't be spending so much money. And now just take a few moments to bring to mind some of the shoulds and shouldn'ts that you say to yourself regularly.
And now maybe think of some of the shoulds or shouldn'ts that you might hear from others. And noticing when you hear or say should, how does it make you feel? For me, I notice I feel heavy, I feel burdened, I felt obligated, stressed and kind of restricted. So while it's quite natural and healthy to want pleasant things and stay away from unpleasant things and to have values and morals, things become very problematic when they turn into rigid internal rules. When this happens, we often become really stressed, judgmental, critical, and even righteous. Our shoulds make us feel like we're never good enough and we often extend this to others as well.
So as one teacher said to me, it's hard for anyone to measure up when we're shooting all over ourselves. So some of our shoulds are things we subconsciously pick up in our childhood, or maybe from the media. Some we pick up from religion or the culture we live in. Some come from the expectations of our peer group. But wherever they come from, if we don't question our shoulds, they end up controlling us, limiting us and disempowering us.
So imagine what it would be like to drop your shoulds in a relationship, or maybe dropping the shoulds about your body, or maybe letting go of the shoulds in a difficult situation in your life. Imagining that, what does it feel like? It probably feels relaxing, relieving and freeing, right? Like putting down a heavy load? So if any of this resonates with you, my invitation for you today and ongoing is to shift your, I should to I choose. So if you'd like to lose some weight, for instance, then your inner and outer voice would say, I choose to lose weight. And maybe you do that because you care about your health. Or if you want to spend less money, you'd say to yourself, I choose to save money.
And maybe you're choosing that because you want to invest in your future. So when you choose, it really connects you back to your genuine reasons for wanting to do or not do something. And that's so much more empowering and life affirming. So each time you catch yourself thinking I should, change to I choose. In this way, you are no longer chained to shoulds and you're empowered to choose what's right for you from a place of awareness and inner strength.
So as always, thank you for your practice and your presence here with us. And now let's begin to settle in for today's meditation.
Dropping the Should’s
Personalized support for learning how to integrate mindfulness into your life. Delivered fresh everyday by our world renowned experts. Choose meditation duration:
Duration
Your default time is based on your progress and is changed automatically as you practice.
Hi, and welcome to your Daily Mindfulness. Today I'm going to talk about dropping the shoulds. So to start off with, I'd like to invite you to listen to the following sentences and just notice if they sound familiar to you and how they make you feel when you hear them. I should be a better partner. I should be getting more sleep.
I shouldn't be eating so much. I should be a better parent. I should have known better. I shouldn't be spending so much money. And now just take a few moments to bring to mind some of the shoulds and shouldn'ts that you say to yourself regularly.
And now maybe think of some of the shoulds or shouldn'ts that you might hear from others. And noticing when you hear or say should, how does it make you feel? For me, I notice I feel heavy, I feel burdened, I felt obligated, stressed and kind of restricted. So while it's quite natural and healthy to want pleasant things and stay away from unpleasant things and to have values and morals, things become very problematic when they turn into rigid internal rules. When this happens, we often become really stressed, judgmental, critical, and even righteous. Our shoulds make us feel like we're never good enough and we often extend this to others as well.
So as one teacher said to me, it's hard for anyone to measure up when we're shooting all over ourselves. So some of our shoulds are things we subconsciously pick up in our childhood, or maybe from the media. Some we pick up from religion or the culture we live in. Some come from the expectations of our peer group. But wherever they come from, if we don't question our shoulds, they end up controlling us, limiting us and disempowering us.
So imagine what it would be like to drop your shoulds in a relationship, or maybe dropping the shoulds about your body, or maybe letting go of the shoulds in a difficult situation in your life. Imagining that, what does it feel like? It probably feels relaxing, relieving and freeing, right? Like putting down a heavy load? So if any of this resonates with you, my invitation for you today and ongoing is to shift your, I should to I choose. So if you'd like to lose some weight, for instance, then your inner and outer voice would say, I choose to lose weight. And maybe you do that because you care about your health. Or if you want to spend less money, you'd say to yourself, I choose to save money.
And maybe you're choosing that because you want to invest in your future. So when you choose, it really connects you back to your genuine reasons for wanting to do or not do something. And that's so much more empowering and life affirming. So each time you catch yourself thinking I should, change to I choose. In this way, you are no longer chained to shoulds and you're empowered to choose what's right for you from a place of awareness and inner strength.
So as always, thank you for your practice and your presence here with us. And now let's begin to settle in for today's meditation.
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Melli has a beautiful way of guiding and reminding us of the stillness within.
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I have been on a journey of healing and learning self-love. Amidst the work, I have been using the mindfulness app for the gentle reminders, guides to the moment (especially the difficult ones).
Kelly Boys offers a fresh and illuminating take on how to step out of lifelong patterns that keep snagging us.
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Truly life changing. This isn't solely meditation and mindfulness...this is about striving to be the best the versions of ourselves.
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Relaxing and assuring beyond description... thank you, Cory.
- Babs312
This is the app I turn to when I want to feel calm and loved.
- Abby
Melli has a beautiful way of guiding and reminding us of the stillness within.
- Adrienne James
I have been on a journey of healing and learning self-love. Amidst the work, I have been using the mindfulness app for the gentle reminders, guides to the moment (especially the difficult ones).
Kelly Boys offers a fresh and illuminating take on how to step out of lifelong patterns that keep snagging us.
- Tara Brach, PhD
Truly life changing. This isn't solely meditation and mindfulness...this is about striving to be the best the versions of ourselves.
- Marisa, Plus+ Member
Relaxing and assuring beyond description... thank you, Cory.
- Babs312
This is the app I turn to when I want to feel calm and loved.
- Abby
Melli has a beautiful way of guiding and reminding us of the stillness within.
- Adrienne James
I have been on a journey of healing and learning self-love. Amidst the work, I have been using the mindfulness app for the gentle reminders, guides to the moment (especially the difficult ones).
Kelly Boys offers a fresh and illuminating take on how to step out of lifelong patterns that keep snagging us.
- Tara Brach, PhD
Truly life changing. This isn't solely meditation and mindfulness...this is about striving to be the best the versions of ourselves.
- Marisa, Plus+ Member
Relaxing and assuring beyond description... thank you, Cory.
- Babs312
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- Paul Gilbert, PhD, FBPsS, OBE, Centre for Compassion Research and Training, University of Derby, United Kingdom
Excellent! Cory gently guides you into internal peace.
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A necessary tool for those who feel lost.
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I start every day with Cory or Melli for my daily practice. Including this app into my practice helps me continue to build more mental focus and understanding of my thought processes. What a welcome and powerful gift.
- Oku
Shamash's guidance is a gift of wisdom to help us in our busy and stressful lives.
- Paul Gilbert, PhD, FBPsS, OBE, Centre for Compassion Research and Training, University of Derby, United Kingdom
Excellent! Cory gently guides you into internal peace.
- Steve Ericson
A necessary tool for those who feel lost.
- Piper
Just want to say a big thankyou to all involved as this has had a positive impact in my daily life 🙏 Valuable teachings that have allowed me to have a better relationship not only with those around me, but with myself. Heal ourselves and we heal the world 💫✨🌍
- Marty
I start every day with Cory or Melli for my daily practice. Including this app into my practice helps me continue to build more mental focus and understanding of my thought processes. What a welcome and powerful gift.
- Oku
Shamash's guidance is a gift of wisdom to help us in our busy and stressful lives.
- Paul Gilbert, PhD, FBPsS, OBE, Centre for Compassion Research and Training, University of Derby, United Kingdom
Excellent! Cory gently guides you into internal peace.
- Steve Ericson
A necessary tool for those who feel lost.
- Piper
Just want to say a big thankyou to all involved as this has had a positive impact in my daily life 🙏 Valuable teachings that have allowed me to have a better relationship not only with those around me, but with myself. Heal ourselves and we heal the world 💫✨🌍
- Marty
I start every day with Cory or Melli for my daily practice. Including this app into my practice helps me continue to build more mental focus and understanding of my thought processes. What a welcome and powerful gift.
- Oku
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